How To Have Proper Modern Day Etiquette

Grant Anschuetz | Slump Sports

I was checking out Twitter “moments” today, and I came across an “Investiagtion of modern-day etiquette” section.

It was filled with tweets (mostly questions) regarding what modern day etiquette is.

So let’s answer those questions and add a few other general rules. Read carefully because this is important life advice.


I don’t watch Game of Thrones or have an HBOGo account, but if you’re borrowing someone else’s account to watch then you have to give them priority. Because if you don’t, then you probably won’t be friends anymore because I hear that Game of Thrones is pretty important stuff.


Absolutely not. Tinder is for dating. If you don’t see yourself dating that acquaintance for whatever reason then swipe left. It’s your moral obligation.


Sort of. You’re definitely bound to get some looks when a flash goes off but there’s no smell so overall it’s better.


Not that complicated. You just push the button. It’s not that you don’t trust the other person, it’s just that you don’t want to risk it considering that you have an important place to be. Also, twice the push means it turns to the white walking sign twice as fast. Everyone knows that.


I can relate to this tweet. I always pull my phone back when I want to show someone something, but they want to hold it. The problem is, the phone holder comes off as suspicious and not trusting because they don’t want someone else to hold their phone. Also, it’s tough to see something on a phone if you’re not holding it yourself. Best thing to do if you’re the person being shown something is to pretend like you saw what they are trying to show you, read their body language, and respond accordingly.


Assuming this person is talking about someone who you don’t know well and this is the first time you’ve been to their house then the answer is that first time, but you have to play it right. A full proof plan is to ask roughly after you’ve been there for at least 10 minutes and say the classic “I’ve almost used up all of data”, but the icing on the cake is if you say you need to send out an important email for work and your normal signal is pretty bad. Nobody will say no to that.

Those were the answers to the Twitter questions, so now I’ll add a few more that weren’t mentioned.

7. Don’t take multiple snapchat selfies with the volume on so other people can hear the clicking noise when you take the picture. One slip up is fine but more than one is annoying and draws unnecessary attention.

8. Unless you really need to see the texts you receive instantly then there’s no need to have a sound notification on when you’re with a group of people. It’s irritating. Put it on vibrate.

9. Don’t snoop through somebody’s phone behind their back or even if they give you permission to do it. You’re better than that and don’t need to know what’s on there.

10. Try your best not to get into long conversations/arguments on Twitter unless it is something interesting that other people would want to see/know about it. When in doubt, just subtweet the crap out of people because that’s how you get the party started.

P.S. A common theme has been to criticize people for making their snapchat story pretty much the whole concert they are at. I actually enjoy this (as long as it is someone good performing). It’s basically going to a concert for free via snapchat. That’s a win for everyone.

Be sure to let me know what you think (whether you agree or disagree). Also, what else did I miss?





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